How to give yourself the most erotically pleasurable Rosh Hashanah ever.

What better way to ring in the Jewish new year than with the subtle anti-Semitism of offering a discount on something? Next they'll tell us they've got special deals on inflatable women that remind you of your mother, or vibrators with "Successful Doctor" written on them. Still, this is great news for that one lonely Jew out there who was seriously contemplating sticking his penis in a shofar.